Four Things Not To Say to a Suffering Friend

By Refadoc, Posted on : Monday, 22 September 2014 - 6:00 pm IST

Four Things Not To Say to a Suffering Friend

When your friend is suffering from any loss, be it a death in the family, a divorce or a miscarriage, it can be often very difficult to say anything or offer any condolence. The common things to say can be ‘I am sorry’, ‘I understand’ or ‘I’ll be keeping you in my thoughts or prayers’. Though these lines may seem to be comforting to you, they can be the things you should not be speaking.

  • I understand how you are feeling: This may seem to be very comforting to you, but this is something which you should avoid speaking. Even if you are of an opinion that you have undergone something similar to this experience, there won’t be any chance that you could be feeling the way the other person it. You can without a doubt, empathize or relate to the other person, but you cannot pretend to go inside someone’s mind and be in their place.
  • This must be God’s Plan: This can be taken in different ways by different people. Someone can ask you this very simple question as to why would God want me to suffer like hell on this earth? Instead of bringing God’s plan into play, you should be reaffirming the other person of his faith. Saying that this was all pre planned can come out to be very insensitive on your part and could even be taken as something which questions the belief of the person going through an emotional turmoil.
  • If you need me, give me a call: This is very common and is something which everyone says. In order to sound sympathetic, everyone tends to say this to the grieving person. However, it is very vague and tends to put all the burden of irresponsibility on the person who is going through a personal loss. It is very unrealistic to think that a person going grief is going to come out and call you to help them out. Instead of asking the other person to come out and ask for your help, you should be going out and offering to help them with their everyday chores. Taking them out for a weekend in order to bring a change in their monotonous lifestyle after going through the loss.
  • This too will Pass: This is a good phrase, however, it should be avoided in terms of loss. If you tell someone that he or she will soon be feeling well, after this episode has passed, it is nothing else but wishful thinking. This can also be taken as something which invalidates the pain of the other person.

When you are keeping these things in mind, then it is going to maximize your ability to help your friend minimize the loss.  

  • Psychology,Lifestyle
Add Comment
Add Comment

Login to Add Comment

Email
Password
Comment as Guest

Most Read

Popular Articles

22 Proven Natural Home Remedies to Remove Blackheads

22 Proven Natural Home Remedies to Remove Blackheads

Though Blackheads can affect you at any age, they are most often an issue that teenagers seem to ...
Rooibos Tea Benefits for Health, Weight Loss, Pregnancy & Side Effects

Rooibos Tea Benefits for Health, Weight Loss, Pregnancy & Side Effects

Not many people know about the amazing health benefits of Rooibos Tea. However, this beverage, wh...
How to get rid of bad breath

How to get rid of bad breath

Bad Breath is considered the single most putting off factor for p...
10 Remarkable Benefits of Chlorophyll

10 Remarkable Benefits of Chlorophyll

There might be a lot of hype when it comes to the healthy benefits of green vegetables, which hav...
Psoriasis

Psoriasis

Psoriasis tre...
13 Effective Home Remedies for Dry Skin

13 Effective Home Remedies for Dry Skin

Dry and flaky skin can often be experienced all over the year, though they are much more common d...
HPV

HPV

Overcoming The Myths Of HPV (Human Papilloma Virus) HPV or Human Papilloma Virus is kno...
Headaches and Migraines

Headaches and Migraines

Keeping Migraines at Bay Simply Some everyday habits can be incorporated into your ever...
Remarkable Benefits of Almonds for Health, Weight Loss & Skin

Remarkable Benefits of Almonds for Health, Weight Loss & Skin

Almonds are one of the most popular tree nuts available all over the world. They are available bo...
Chyawanprash- Health Benefits, Ingredients, Dosage, Nutritional Facts, Side Effects

Chyawanprash- Health Benefits, Ingredients, Dosage, Nutritional Facts, Side Effects

Chyawanprash is a name given to an Ayurvedic supplement which is fortified and constituted with v...
13 Incredible Benefits of Orange Juice for Radiant Skin & Health

13 Incredible Benefits of Orange Juice for Radiant Skin & Health

Orange Juice is made from unfermented and fresh oranges, providing a variety of health benefits. ...
Eating rice won't make you fat

Eating rice won't make you fat

Before assessing whether eating rice leads to weight gain, let us try to understand why do we gai...